Help! I'm so confused and terrified!
I'm so terrified it's not funny.Yes, God answered and He has provided. Full scholarship and partial assistantship. I am so happy when I received the news that I immediately told the officer I'll go. Yes, it meant I gave them a "Yes" answer and they are expecting me to be there this fall.
You know how a human mind can sometimes overlook the biggest blessing and focus on other issues that worries you? It happened to me and boy, I had a hard time. It almost made me give up going to grad school totally.
1. Housing -- MAJOR problem. No on-campus housing for grad students so I got to go hunt for apartments. My officer volunteered her help and I am so grateful for her. My friends are looking all over downtown area to look for an apartment that is cosy, safe and near the bus stops (so I won't freeze when walking there during winter). Some even write to other grad students for help. I mean, thank GOD for friends like that and I can never thank them enough. But fear crept in when I began to think about leases, deposits, rent, safety, furnishing, hot water, heater, cable, TV, phone.....and many other stuffs that are SOOOOOOO minor (yes, I even thought about bookshelves and bedsheets and toiletries and hair dryer and towels and utensils and kettle and 3-in-1 coffee......). I AM SO SHELTERED IN SINGAPORE! I FEEL LIKE I'M GOING OFF TO BOOT CAMP, ONLY THIS BOOT CAMP IS REAL LIFE!
2. Bank -- Need to settle my checking account here and open one there. Don't know which bank to choose. Got to do it soon because my dad got to send some cash for me and the college needs one to deposit money into.
3. Documents -- TONNES. Financial, visa, health, insurance, campus employment, social security, campus ID etc etc etc........ DISGUSTING
4. Loans -- Need to defer my loan repayment to CPF.
5. Insurance -- Don't know what to do about this. JANICE!!!!!
6. Medical Checkup -- Need to see my handsome doctor again :-)
7. Courses -- Registration. Least of my worries.
8. Teaching -- HAHAHAH! Can you imagine me lecturing!!??!! I better read more. Maybe I request to do research better.
9. Thesis -- It has been a LONG time since I've written SOMETHING.
10. Air ticket and packing -- Final leg. Don't even know when I should be there. Better check school calendar. Mental note: I need winter clothes.
11,12,13,14,15,16......List will grow. I promise.
Seriously, I am so wornout just by looking at the list. And I only have effectively 4 months! FOUR MONTHS! And I got to settle SO MANY THINGS!
I need a personal assistant.
But I have God. He is my Personal Assistant and He will give me triumph over all circumstances. My neighbour reminded me of that.
However, frankly, I am still confused and terrified.
Not trying to hide anything but yes, I'll be lying to say that I'm all raving and charging to go.
In fact, I'm scared. Excited and scared. Reminds me of a song...
"Into the woods I have to go
I hate to leave I have to though
Into the woods it's time and so
I must begin my journey
Into the woods and through the trees
To where I am expected Ma'am
The way is clear
The light is good
I have no fear nor no one should
The woods are just trees
The trees are just wood
No need to be afraid there"
Yup. I am excited and scared. I need help. I need peace of mind. I need my brain back.
Out.
=====
In-sane. Really.
Sane reflects @ this location permanently
1 reflects:
You'll be leaving in 4 months !!!!! That's fast sister... we will definitely miss you, sob sob...
Dun get so worried abt the whole process yar ? I'm beri beri sure God will help you. He is not only your personal assistant, He is also your ALMIGHTY, OMNIPRESENT, POWERFUL Daddy in heaven who goes before you and prepare the room, the school, the people you will be meeting and all those minor things that you are worried about. Daddy knows and He cares... He will surely be there.
Ganbatte sister !
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